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home menu archive jokes other sites vor.com pdcomedy.com linksdump privacy/contact @twitvor horoscopes for september 2017 aries mar 20 - apr 19 anvils, molten steel, but not oversized hammers, are moderately starred this month, as are oversized hats and trombones. women who inadvertently purr and men who grunt are badly starred particularly in the shower. beware the tolling of the bell for which you previously asked whom it tolled. nothing good will come of it. ernest hemingway tops the charts of dead writers that are enticingly priced reads you should avoid this month, at least until saturn transects a trajectory of literary significance. your faith in corporate governance is about to be tested by an aggressive banker who doesn't know his apr from his elbow. [more horoscopes ==>>] our exclusive keep brexiting and carry on t-shirts sell out big ben's secret bongs discovered big ben bonged yesterday afternoon only days after apparently bonging for the last time before refurbishments inside the tower. with health and safety concerns thought to be more important than workmen losing their eardrums, big ben, now known as elizabeth, stopped bonging according to official channels for the next 4 years apart from on special occasions. but yesterday afternoon big ben bonged at 3pm, shocking those nearby who heard the bongs and knew that the day was nothing special. one witness told this newspaper: "i heard the bongs. first i thought it was some kind of recording but then i realised what it was. the bongs were coming from big ben!" we have contacted the mayor of london for a comment, but at the time of writing have not received a reply. a scientist told this newspaper: "technically speaking a bong is the hammer hitting the bell in the big ben tower and not the bong sound, but if the bell is not free to bong then nobody at ground level would hear anything. however if an actual bong has been heard then i have no idea what is going on. that would be the seventh craziest thing i have heard all year." the bonging continues. (video found on linksdump.com ) correction: in yesterday's advertorial: tourist burger 'big ben hambongers' half price offer it seems there was an error: the usual price is £22.99 for the hambonger and not £18.99 as we claimed. we are reluctant to set our advertisers straight. [link] conor mcgregor beats floyd mayweather t-shirts now half price eclipse proves god exists, claims man in robes "the moon is just exactly the right size to fit in front of the sun which is millions of miles behind it? give over if you think that is a random occurrence," said a man wearing robes, standing by a river and with angelic music playing behind him, this morning. speaking after watching the eclipses this week, many americans, some as old as 83, declared it was proof that god existed. they said: "it's the one sign god has given us and science completely ignores it. what are the chances that the moon is just exactly the right size to almost cover the sun when seen from earth? billions to one against. it must be god's work." a scientist we asked for a comment mumbled incoherently for five minutes before hanging up the phone. he may have been drunk. the end of the world approaches. (video found on linksdump.com ) also in today's paper: 10 things not to do during a total eclipse 10 things you must do during a total eclipse numbers of people buying bomb shelters explode [link] kim jong-un didn't pay for conor vs mayweather fight letters to the editor dear sir, which political party is offering a smoothie brexit? that gets my vote. they are delicious, especially the ones with summer fruits in. yours, benny jones dear sir, your article comparing and contrasting disney's up to donald trump as the old guy and kim jong un as his young male friend made me weep with laughter. bravo! yours, jerry mceditor (video sponsored by linksdump.com ) dear sir, if kim jong un becomes a surprise guest on the next series of celebrity big brother is that a good sign or a bad sign as far a nucleararmageddon goes? yours, montgomery churchill iii [link] our exclusive keep brexiting and carry on t-shirts sell out north korea enjoys national day of total silence you could literally hear a pin drop in hermit state north korea today as a national day of total silence was declared. "a national day of total silence has never been attempted in a dirty noisy western country," according to a proud looking north korean newsreader, his speech silenced with subtitles at the bottom of the screen.. in a day of total silence cars are not allowed on the roads. bicycles have their bells taken off by the police, and even the snipping sounds of scissors in barber shops are quietened at the risk of being shot. a national day of total silence is held annually in north korea. if kim jong un was to declare nuclear war today it will be completely unexpected, according to a north korean expert. the build up to war continues. (video found on linksdump.com ) correction: in yesterday's story: ryan air 'outside of plane toilets' is fake news, says ceo it seems there was an error: the donald trump oversized tennis outfit racket and balls set advertised in the section to the right of the article retails at £56.99, we are happy to set the record straight. [link] special advertising giveaway: it's always sunny with spreadable phillidelphia danny devito pastry mold for every reader donald trump is not telling anyone what he is doing next donald trump kept to one of his campaign pledges to not tell foreign countries what he is going to do next, to keep everyone on their toes. this includes kim jong un, but also includes other world leaders, apart from theresa may. "if i tell foreign leaders what i'm going to do next they work out ways of making what i want to do go all wrong," said the president, 71. "so, for instance, if i am playing golf then they will think that i'm not going to declare a nuclear war. if i am going to declare nuclear war then the last place anybody will expect me to do it is on a golf course. so that is the most likely place i would do it. or i might not do it there at all because they are expecting it. i'm not telling you until i do it. and i'm not telling you i'm not doing it either, so get that fake news look off your face," said president trump. the end of north korea approaches. (video found on linksdump.com ) also in today's paper: disney's up is not kim jong un and donald trump, confirms executive sales of bomb shelters go through roof numbers of people buying bomb shelters explode [link] is it time to rename north korea on the maps, asks world map maker for 2019 edition letters to the editor dear sir, they criticise mr trump for playing too much golf during these times of imminent nuclear war, but i think he is doing the right thing. they say that war is like a game of golf, or so my teachers used to tell me. oh, hang on a minute, isn't it cricket that is like war? yes... it's cricket isn't it? doh! totally ruins the thrust of my argument. huh! yours, benny jones dear sir, your article comparing and contrasting disney's up to donald trump as the old guy and kim jong un as his young male friend made me weep with laughter. bravo! yours, jerry mceditor (video sponsored by linksdump.com ) dear sir, if kim jong un becomes a surprise guest on celebrity big brother is that a good sign or a bad sign? yours, montgomery churchill iii [link] brexit negotations part 26: chances of a smoochy brexit rise by 2.5% uk government to offer 40bn in brexit divorce offer in an attempt to get trade talks going the british government has offered 40 billion to the european union, but won't say what currency it is. talking to this newspaper theresa may said: "40 billion is a real and sensible offer in a genuine attempt to get trade talks going." but when asked what currency the 40 billion was may, 61, became unclear. she said: "40 billion is a lot of money. i mean al-oooooooooo-t of money. and we will give it to them

URL analysis for thevoiceofreason.co.uk

http://www.thevoiceofreason.co.uk/rssxml/rss_feed.xml
http://www.thevoiceofreason.co.uk/2017/08/06aug2017.htm
http://www.thevoiceofreason.co.uk/privacypolicy.htm
http://www.thevoiceofreason.co.uk/2017/07/23july2017.htm
http://www.thevoiceofreason.co.uk/privacypolicy.htm
http://www.thevoiceofreason.co.uk/archive/archive.htm
http://www.thevoiceofreason.co.uk/rssxml/funnyjokes.xml
http://www.thevoiceofreason.co.uk/horoscopes/2017-09.htm
http://www.thevoiceofreason.co.uk/worldsfunniestjokes/index.htm
http://www.thevoiceofreason.co.uk/2017/08/13aug2017.htm
http://www.thevoiceofreason.co.uk/2017/08/27aug2017.htm
http://www.thevoiceofreason.co.uk/horoscopes/2017-08.htm

Whois Information

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Domain name:
thevoiceofreason.co.uk

Data validation:
Nominet was able to match the registrant's name and address against a 3rd party data source on 15-Feb-2018

Registrar:
123-Reg Limited t/a 123-reg [Tag = 123-REG]
URL: http://www.123-reg.co.uk

Relevant dates:
Registered on: 13-Mar-1999
Expiry date: 13-Mar-2019
Last updated: 06-Mar-2018

Registration status:
Registered until expiry date.

Name servers:
pdns03.domaincontrol.com
pdns04.domaincontrol.com

WHOIS lookup made at 19:37:13 22-Jul-2018

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  REFERRER http://www.nominet.org.uk

  REGISTRAR Nominet UK

SERVERS

  SERVER co.uk.whois-servers.net

  ARGS thevoiceofreason.co.uk

  PORT 43

  TYPE domain

DOMAIN

SPONSOR
123-Reg Limited t/a 123-reg [Tag = 123-REG]
URL: http://www.123-reg.co.uk
Relevant dates:

  CREATED 13-Mar-1999

  CHANGED 06-Mar-2018

STATUS
Registered until expiry date.

NSERVER

  PDNS03.DOMAINCONTROL.COM 216.69.185.51

  PDNS04.DOMAINCONTROL.COM 173.201.79.51

  NAME thevoiceofreason.co.uk

DISCLAIMER
This WHOIS information is provided for free by Nominet UK the central registry
for .uk domain names. This information and the .uk WHOIS are:
Copyright Nominet UK 1996 - 2018.
You may not access the .uk WHOIS or use any data from it except as permitted
by the terms of use available in full at https://www.nominet.uk/whoisterms,
which includes restrictions on: (A) use of the data for advertising, or its
repackaging, recompilation, redistribution or reuse (B) obscuring, removing
or hiding any or all of this notice and (C) exceeding query rate or volume
limits. The data is provided on an 'as-is' basis and may lag behind the
register. Access may be withdrawn or restricted at any time.

  REGISTERED no

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