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onely.org: singles' rights and invisible chronic illness sick scribblings from the margins of marital status discrimination home quote board about onely (like how to pronounce it!) being onely about lisa & christina jump to navigation the dangers of living alone: doorknob edition september 27, 2018 posted by onely in uncategorized . 2 comments welcome to the latest installment in our series “the dangers of living alone”. although living alone is a privilege, it also brings serious risks–as described in this earlier post, where christina encountered terror in the toilet. that same bathroom terrorized christina again just recently, as described below. we hope you can learn from her mistakes. i never imagined i would hear myself thinking those words, but there they were, loud in my head: i may have to kick down this door. i may have to kick down this door. i may have to kick down this door. copious readers, if you live by yourself in a house with embedded door latches, here is a list of things you shouldn’t do, in the order in which you shouldn’t do them: 1. do not say, “my guest bathroom doorknob is ugly. it needs replacing.” no it doesn’t. it is fine. just leave it. 2. do not unscrew said doorknob, then remove the handles and bolting mechanism, and then leave the bolt aka spring latch inside the door because you can’t figure out how to remove that part. 3. do not go to lowe’s for advice, then return home with your mission unaccomplished because there were working no automated carts available and your legs are too weak to walk all the way to the doorknob department. (the weak legs will become important later.) 4. do not decide that even though the latch doesn’t retract anymore and could theoretically get stuck in the strike plate, rendering the door inoperable, it’s ok, because you will just remember not to close the door the whole way. 5. do not drink a liter of coconut water, because in your manic sprint to the bathroom you will forget operation embedded latch and slam the door behind you on the way to the toilet. if you follow these instructions, you won’t find yourself zipping up your jeans and then slowly starting to claw at the empty ring in the locked door where the doorknob used to be. i had several thoughts when i realized i was trapped in the bathroom, all of which essentially amounted to, i’m gonna die! “where’s my phone?” not in the bathroom. “will someone hear me if i scream?” no. “will anyone come looking for me?” not for a few days. “what about the cats?” yes, good idea! just shout through the doorknob hole at theo to retrieve a crowbar. “no, i meant what will they eat?” what will you eat? are you gonna stick your hand through the door hole and grab a cat? “can i kick down the door?” you just reamed out the lowe’s manager for not having working motorized carts for your poor legs, but by all means, do kick down the door. “what am i gonna doooooo?” i don’t know. what sort of escape vehicle can you fabricate from a toothbrush, toilet brush, towel, and mauve lipstick? days before, in a fit of uncharacteristic craftiness, i had decided to replace the knob on the vanity with a petoskey stone from lake michigan. i’d put the petoskey stone, bolt, super glue, and a screwdriver in a box next to the toilet, but then my craftiness fit passed and i returned to my normal state of netflix-induced interia. now my wide, panicked eyes saw the box. using the screwdriver, i was able to pry the latch out of the door jam and free myself. in five seconds. this would have been a far better story if i i’d also had to use the stone, bolt, and glue to macgyver my escape, but survivors can’t be choosers. if that screwdriver hadn’t been in the bathroom, i would still be in the bathroom. this scenario brings to mind the age-old stereotype of the single person dying and rotting alone . in the bathroom, i was horrified that no one would miss me right away, either in person or via phone. after i was free, i realized that several people i talked with regularly would have been concerned that i hadn’t checked in. the problem was that they understandably would need a couple days to realize i was dangerously mia. a couple days in the bathroom would have been awful, but doable. i had the necessities: water, toilet, bobby pins (all women who are growing out their bangs know what i’m talking about). the risk seems like a small price to pay for the privilege of living alone–although i might change my mind if i lock myself in the closet during upcoming renovations. stay tuned. –christina share below, and/or visit https://www.facebook.com/1112933498752005 tweet email like this: like loading... coming home to an empty (of humans) house june 27, 2018 posted by onely in uncategorized . 2 comments copious readers, do you have the privilege of living alone ? if so, what’s the very first thing you do when you come home to your empty house? some years ago, my long-distance boyfriend broke up with me because he was “tired of coming home to an empty house.” technically, coming from him that phrase meant, “i have a local woman scoped out to ease my loneliness, but if she doesn’t work out, i’ll come crawling back to you.” but whether you’re looking for an excuse to dump someone or not, “coming home to an empty house” is almost always portrayed as a negative experience. why is that, when so many people across the world live in too-cramped quarters? the rich/western world’s disdain for “coming home to an empty house” is rooted in privilege. it’s also rooted in our obsession with couples and the nuclear family. so. let’s expand how we think about “empty.” maybe i don’t feel an emptiness when i walk in the foyer because i have plants that need watering. maybe i have messages waiting for me on my answering machine (for the purposes of this metaphor, travel with me for a moment back to the days of landlines). maybe i have a friendly ghost. maybe i’m sick of real people and look forward to sitting down with my amazon prime friends of one mississippi . but mostly, maybe i love coming home to an “empty” house because. . . and here we get to the real reason i’m writing this post: cats! as soon as my door swings inward i start to yodel in that way that all cat people do when they are out of human hearing (and sometimes, when they aren’t). i always start out with, “hi guize!” this is a gender-neutral form of “guys”, which is necessary because i have two man cats and one woman cat. then my vocabulary and sentence structure just go downhill from there: how’s my special treasure trovey muppets? are you purrs? hewwo theo, hewwo murpity. yes, kisses! kiiiiiissssses!! i love you so so much. you are my most special moggie buppets yes indeed. you are like angels in my life forever! where’s your brother? where’s big al? is he sleeps? i missed you alls so much. you are so very very specialest to me! the other day in the midst of these linguistic acrobatics i realized that i have never, ever greeted any one of my significant other with this much effusiveness. according to disney (more…) share below, and/or visit https://www.facebook.com/1112933498752005 tweet email like this: like loading... please respond: survey on single life june 13, 2016 posted by onely in everyday happenings , take action , your responses requested! . tags: marital status discrimination , melody abrahams , meredith zeitlin , singles blog , singles survey 3 comments hi copious readers, some dedicated writers-slash-singles-advocates have asked me to share this link and ask you to fill out the survey you’ll find there. these researchers are exploring how single people are perceived and treated by society. the result will be a book for lay people–by which i mean, not an academic book. the survey is simple, digital, and multiple-choice. please share it forward if you can! https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/singlesquestions thanks, christina share below, and/or visit https://www.facebook.com/1112933498752005 tweet email like this: like loading..

URL analysis for onely.org

https://onely.org/2018/09/27/the-dangers-of-living-alone-doorknob-edition/
https://onely.org/category/great-onely-activities/
https://onely.org/tag/amatonormative/
https://onely.org/tag/rhetoric/
https://onely.org/2016/03/24/tackle-a-bad-day-with-this-tip/
https://onely.org/category/heteronormativity/
https://onely.org/2016/03/02/single-then-you-dont-have-money-problems-with-your-family-or-friends/billets_de_5000/
https://onely.org/tag/international-travel/
https://onely.org/tag/the-f-word/
https://onely.org/2008/08/11/being-eaten-by-cats-thoughts-on-the-myth-of-dying-single/
https://onely.org/tag/laura-kipnis/
https://onely.org/tag/ellen-schattschneider/
https://onely.org/tag/ella-morton/
https://onely.org/tag/bella-depaulo/
https://onely.org/tag/compulsory-heterosexuality/

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  NS1.WORDPRESS.COM 198.181.116.9

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  NS3.WORDPRESS.COM 192.0.74.9

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